Pizza is the world’s greatest food. Nothing says “I love you,” “I’m sorry,” or “let’s be friends” better than pizza. It’s a universal love language and is perfect at any time, for any occasion, especially when you don’t know what to say. From funny pizza quotes to cheesy pizza puns, here are our favorite pizza quotes from pizza lovers worldwide, from celebrity Jennifer Lawrence to professional baseball star Yogi Berra.
Best Pizza Quotes
Next time you’re trying to express your love for pizza, use these quotes as inspiration. Eat the whole pizza.
1. Pizza makes anything possible.
– Henry Rollins.
2. Anyone who says that money cannot buy happiness has clearly never spent their money on pizza.
– Andrew W.K.
3. There’s very little in my world that a foot massage and a thin-crust, everything-on-it pizza won’t set right.
– G.A. McKevett.
4. I want pizza with my face on it.
– Jennifer Lawrence.
5. Ideas are like pizza dough, made to be tossed around.
– Anna Quindlen.
6. The closest thing I use to beauty products is the grease on the pizza from John’s Pizzeria.
– Mark Feuerstein.
7. Any pizza can be personal if you cry while eating it.
– Aparna Nancherla.
8. I love pizza. I want to marry it but it would just be to eat her family at the wedding.
– Mike Birbiglia.
9. I just want to be in my sweats, walk my dog, watch TV and eat pizza.
– America Ferrera.
10. There’s no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box in your lap.
– Kevin James.
11. The perfect lover is one who turns into a pizza at 4:00 a.m.
– Charles Pierce.
12. Those pizzas I ate were for medicinal purposes.
– Amy Neftzger.
13. Pizza is like the entire food pyramid.
– Madeline Oles.
14. You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I’m not hungry enough to eat six.
– Yogi Berra.
15. I think of dieting, then I eat pizza.
– Lara Stone.
16. I love pizza, meaning: Even when I’m in the middle of eating pizza, I wish I were eating pizza.
– Jandy Nelson.
17. I’d rather have leftover pizza than leftover feelings.
– Sarah Burgess.
18. A Pizza Slice a day keeps Sadness Away.
– Jet Paacal.
19. Life is mostly pain and struggle; the rest is love and deep dish pizza.
– Benedict Smith.
20. My love is pizza shaped. Won’t you have a slice? It’s circular, so there’s enough to go around.
– Dora J. Arod.
21. Pizza is good medicine for disappointment.
– Katherine Howe.
22. But magic is like pizza: even when it’s bad, it’s pretty good.
– Neil Patrick Harris.
23. You know what? Part of me just wants to eat a pizza and go to sleep.
– Gwen Stefani.
24. I love pizza; you can’t really go wrong with pizza.
– Nick Jonas.
25. When life give you pizza, eat it quickly before anyone realizes that you have it.
26. Sex is like pizza: if you’re going to use BBQ sauce, you better know what the fuck you’re doing.
– Oliver Markus Malloy.
27. I want to live in a world where the need for pizza belittles that of war.
– Jason Barnett.
28. Heaven would be a comfortable chair, a library, Diet Coke, and an occasional cheese pizza. Sex once in a while. No talking.
– Jayden Hunter.
29. There is no moment in life that can’t be improved with pizza.
30. Unless you are a pizza, the answer is yes, I can live without you.
– Bill Murray.
31. Gather ’round the good stuff!
– Pizza Hut.
32. Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!
– Aubrey Plaza as April Ludgate from Parks & Recreation.
33. If you want to eat pizza, have the pizza.
– Tess Holliday.
34. And I don’t cook, either. Not as long as they still deliver pizza.
35. I’m always in the mood for pizza.
– Emma Kenney.
36. We’re mostly macrobiotic, but sometimes I take the family out for a pizza.
– John Lennon.
37. Everybody loves dogs. They’re the pizza of the animal kingdom.
– Stephen Colbert.
38. You judge a pizza place on their cheese slice.
– Dave Portnoy.
39. I have to admit I don’t like pizza. I love it. And I am prepared to do literally anything to get my hands on a slice.
– Liz Truss.
40. When working, my diet degrades to pizza three times a day, because I don’t want to distract myself from anything.
– Chuck Palahniuk.
41. “You can’t make everyone happy. You’re not pizza.”
42. “I think of dieting, then I eat pizza.”
– Lara Stone
43. “Pizza is a lot like sex. When it’s good, it’s really good. When it’s bad, it’s still pretty good.”
– Unknown (often attributed to Kevin James)
44. “Pizza is a sacred thing in my household.”
– Jim Gaffigan
45. “I’m a pizza-aholic.”
– Sophia Bush
46. “You can’t just have water, you have to have some pizza.”
– John Travolta
47. “I love pizza so much, I would marry it.”
– Jena Malone
48. “I love pizza; I want to marry it.”
– JWoww (Jenni Farley)
49. “All I want in life is pizza and someone to love who will buy me pizza.”
50. “Pizza is not just a food, it’s an emotion.”
51. “Pizza is the only love triangle I want.”
52. “Pizza is the answer, no matter what the question is.”
53. “I just want to be happy and eat pizza.”
54. “Pizza is a universal language that everyone understands.”
55. “Pizza is a hug in a slice.”
56. “Life is short, but there is always time for pizza.”
57. “The radiation left over from the Big Bang is the same as that in your microwave oven but very much less powerful. It would heat your pizza only to minus 271.3*C – not much good for defrosting the pizza, let alone cooking it.”
– Stephen Hawking
58. “Pizza time.”
– Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire) in “Spider-Man 2” (2004)
59. “You don’t put pineapple on pizza!”
– Deadpool (Ryan Reynolds) in “Deadpool 2” (2018)
60. “Pizza, dude’s got 30 seconds.”
– Michelangelo (Michelan Sisti) in “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” (1990)
61. “Pizza. Great equalizer. Rich people love pizza. Poor people love pizza. White people love pizza. Black people love pizza. Do black people like pizza?”
– Scott Lang (Paul Rudd) in “Ant-Man” (2015)
62. “I’m gonna go home and have some pizza.”
– Kevin McCallister (Macaulay Culkin) in “Home Alone” (1990)
63. “I love pizza. I love it! I think pizza might be my soulmate.”
– Juno MacGuff (Ellen Page) in “Juno” (2007)
64. “Pizza. The food of the gods. A topping for every mood.”
– Shrek (Mike Myers) in “Shrek 2” (2004)
65. “I’m just a kid who loves pizza. Who happens to be an incredibly quick learner.”
– Flint Lockwood (Bill Hader) in “Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs” (2009)
66. “Pizza is my business.”
– The Pizza Planet delivery guy (Debi Derryberry) in “Toy Story” (1995)
67. “Pizza’s good. You have pizza, I like pizza.”
– Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) in “Iron Man” (2008)
We hope these pizza quotes are motivational or just funny!